After a viral video resurfaced on social networks such as; Facebook and Twitter, a lot of people have been asking each other, “Can guys and girls be just friends?”. This is a controversial question that often has parties split on both sides, and it seems that the majority of females say “Yes”, while the majority of guys say “No”. The main reason that people might say yes, is because they might know members of the opposite sex that they consider to be friends. The people who say no mostly say so because there is some form of attraction involved. Watch the video below for an insight.
So maybe the question should be rephrased. Can guys and girls be friends without an ulterior motive? Maybe this question will shift the balance a bit. From my experience and what I’ve seen, the answer is quite simply… no, and I choose to run like Usain Bolt when it comes to friendships with a female.
Let’s face it, guys and girls are different. A guy will always be directly attracted (by what he sees) and a girl indirectly (by what she feels). I’d rather not be the one to influence someones emotions by spending too much time with them, nor do I want to fall prey to a female I find “physically fit”.
Getting into a “friendship” with a member of the opposite sex is taken too lightly in this day and age. What might start off as a friendly relationship and nothing else, may progress into something where a lot of people, even Christians, compromise their beliefs. People nowadays are even taking casual sex into the equation, accepting it as something that happens between “friends”, there has to be a line somewhere right?
I bet anyone that is reading this now has fallen into the trap of a friendship that they took too lightly. You spend a lot of time with someone, and then you start thinking about that person for the majority of the day, even dreaming about them. The next thing you know you’re having fantasies about dating and marrying them. All of this to find out that they have feelings for someone else, and you’ve been made to look like a third wheel. What starts off as a fun experience turns into something that brings a lot of pain, and can affect the way you view other people for the rest of your life if you don’t take the right precautions.
There’s also the other side of the spectrum. Often the two do have feelings for each other, and what they decide to do to resolve this is to get into some sort of relationship. The problem here, is that without the right council from mentors and maturity, these feelings lead you down a road which you wish you never went near. Relying on your emotions alone, isn’t enough, there are other factors involved such as; timing and environment.
I guess what I’m saying here is that people need to step back and analyse situations carefully. Are you mature enough to maintain a friendship with a guy/girl without potentially damaging that person emotionally? If you are, then hats off to you, maybe you should teach us how. If you’re not emotionally mature, is it worth the risk? A friend said something interesting on our Facebook page, “…for some reason friendly has become synonymous with flirty”. So does this mean that the meaning of friendship has changed?
I can say that I have females involved in my life, but I keep them at a distance. Never am I alone with them, neither am I ever communicating with them in a manner that suggests that I want to get close to them. All this is to protect all parties involved.
Where do you draw the line? Even in Church! What kind of friendships are you in? Just because you’re a Christian doesn’t automatically mean you’re safe.
What habits can you stop which give way to temptation?
- Adding complete strangers on Facebook/BBM
- Meeting a new person and taking their number
- Being alone with someone
- Opening up too much to someone about your life
Do you agree or disagree? Leave a comment and let us know.